What do shy people do

The more you know about your anxiety, the more you can start to challenge it. Jessie Sun, a PhD student at the University of California Davis who researches the psychology of personality, stresses that shyness and introversion are not the same thing. Western culture puts great emphasis on making eye contact - but not every other culture is as comfortable with this Credit: Getty Images.

Shy people are often introverted, but they might also be extroverts whose anxiety gets in the way of being sociable. And non-shy introverts might be socially adept but just prefer their own company. But could introverts get in on some of that joy and enthusiasm — by just acting extroverted? Sun and her colleagues did an experiment. They asked people to act extroverted for an entire week — which is a long time for someone who is shy.

But the people who were more introverted didn't experience as much of that boost in positive emotion. And the people who were extreme introverts actually felt more tired and experienced more negative emotion. Extroverts tend to have better feelings of wellbeing, but asking introverts to try and "fake" an extroverted attitude can leave them feeling drained Credit: Getty Images.

The United States is said to value confident , extroverted behaviour over introversion, whereas studies have found that in parts of Asia, including Japan and China, being quiet and reserved is more desirable.

Attitudes towards eye contact also varies hugely from country to country. Despite these cultural differences, Sun says the research seems to show that extroverts tend to be happier even in the countries where introversion is more respected but the degree of happiness is less marked in those countries.

You feel a sense of belonging. I hope this list made every shy person out there smile and feel just a bit more connected to others. These words are for us all. Beyond Worthy , by Jacqueline Whitney. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement.

Corpse Bride 1. Most people find that the more they practice socializing, the easier it gets. Practicing social skills — like assertiveness ; conversation; and friendly, confident body language — can help people overcome shyness, build confidence, and get more enjoyment from everyday experiences. Reviewed by: Colleen Sherman, PhD.

Larger text size Large text size Regular text size. What Is Shyness? Reacting to New Things New and unfamiliar situations can bring out shy feelings — like the first day of school, meeting someone new, or speaking in front of a group for the first time. Why Are Some People Shy? Our genes determine our physical traits, like height, eye color, skin color, and body type.

But genes also influence certain personality traits, including shyness. But not everyone with a genetic tendency to be shy develops a shy temperament. Life experiences also play a role. Life experiences. When people are faced with a situation that may lead them to feel shy, how they deal with that situation can shape their future reactions to similar situations. For example, if people who are shy approach new things little by little, it can help them become more confident and comfortable. But if they feel pushed into situations they don't feel prepared for, or if they are teased or bullied , it can make them even more shy.

The examples other people set can also play a role in whether a person learns to be shy or not. If the parents of a shy child are overly cautious or overprotective, it can teach the child to back away from situations that might be uncomfortable or unfamiliar. Shy Strength Many people want to reduce their shyness. If you're trying to become less shy, it can help to remember: Overcoming shyness takes practice. People who are shy tend to give themselves fewer chances to practice social behaviors.

It's no wonder that people who shy away from socializing don't feel as socially confident as those who are outgoing — they have less practice! The more you practice social behaviors, the easier they get, and the more natural they feel for you.

If you have struggled with shyness your whole life, then you know what it means to battle, endure, and overcome difficult feelings. Without your struggle against shyness, you would not have developed the ability to cope with life's difficulties. Chances are that when you do manage to develop friendships , they are deep and long-lasting. Because making friends is not easy, you may place more value on the friends that you have. Plus, your tendency to avoid small talk means that your friendships are not likely to be superficial.

Many jobs require the ability to focus and concentrate in a solitary environment; this is where some shy people find that they flourish. Not having a lot of social ties means that you have fewer interruptions and less need to validate what you are doing in the eyes of others. Research shows that the brains of shy people react more strongly to both negative and positive stimuli.

Your increased sensitivity to reward may mean you find more value in working toward goals. Everyday shyness that does not prevent you from achieving your goals or participating in life can have its advantages. However, severe shyness or social anxiety that interferes with daily functioning is not helpful, and not something with which you have to live.

If severe social anxiety is a problem for you, be sure to speak to your doctor for a referral to a mental health professional. Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life. Behavioral inhibition system and self-esteem as mediators between shyness and social anxiety.

Psychiatry Res. A comparison of temperament in nonhuman apes and human infants. Dev Sci. Kalliopuska M. Personality variables related to shyness. Psychol Rep. Revisiting shyness and sociability: a preliminary investigation of hormone-brain-behavior relations.